GoTillman

Lifestyle

Hang Up on the Future: The Surprisingly Real Movement of People Ditching Their Smartphones for Rotary Dials and Busy Signals

A growing number of Americans are voluntarily unplugging from their iPhones and returning to the humble landline — not because they can't afford the upgrade, but because they've decided the upgrade was actually a downgrade. We investigated the psychology, the people, and the very real question of whether this is genuine freedom or just the most expensive kind of nostalgia money can buy.

Sep 17, 2026

Comedy

Your Group Chat Has 47 People in It and You're Exhausted: A Practical Guide to Trimming the Social Fat

Modern friendship has quietly become a full-time administrative job, complete with group chats that feel like staff meetings and contacts you haven't spoken to since the Obama administration. It's time to conduct a friendship audit — and yes, that means having some mildly awkward conversations about who actually makes the cut.

Sep 17, 2026

Lifestyle

Sixty Dollars a Session to Find Out I Have No Discernible Talents: My Tour Through America's Hobby Industrial Complex

Somewhere between a lopsided pottery bowl and a CrossFit coach screaming at me to 'embrace the suck,' I had a quiet revelation: maybe not everyone is meant to find their passion, and maybe that's perfectly fine. I spent an embarrassing amount of money sampling the trendiest hobby trial classes America has to offer, and I am here to report back with findings that are equal parts humbling and hilarious. Spoiler: I am not a ceramicist.

Sep 16, 2026

Comedy

The Mute Button Is Not a Crime: A Defense of Quietly Ditching Your Digital Deadweight

Unfollowing someone online shouldn't feel like filing for divorce, and yet here we are, sweating through our shirts over a single tap. We've somehow decided that our social media follower lists are sacred documents that require notarization and a grief counselor to amend. It's time to talk about why digital disconnection feels so catastrophically personal — and why it absolutely doesn't have to.

Sep 16, 2026

Lifestyle

Stop Grinding, Start Living: The Radical Case for Doing Absolutely Nothing

Somewhere between your third side hustle and your fifth motivational podcast, you forgot what it felt like to just exist. GoTillman is here to hand you the permission slip you never knew you needed — consider this your official license to be magnificently, unapologetically unproductive.

Sep 16, 2026

Comedy

Swipe Left on These: A Completely Honest Field Guide to the Dating App Profiles You'll Definitely Recognize

American dating apps are basically a wildlife documentary, and you, dear reader, are both the camera crew and the unsuspecting gazelle. From the guy holding a fish to the woman whose entire personality is 'fluent in sarcasm,' GoTillman breaks down every archetype haunting your For You page — and somehow makes it hurt less.

Sep 16, 2026